thisisgoingtoberushed

   I can't even begin to go into detail about all the stuff that's happened since I last wrote. I've gone out so much more than I ever have before--kareoke, salsa dancing (mojito!), more visiting people, festiforum, bowling, dinners, lots of Prague, etc. It's been loads of fun and extremely tiring and somehow I've still managed to participate a bunch of times in the class I was dreading and didn't really get what was going on in the essay at all. I think that's why I like KL as a professor. I don't love him but I don't hate him. He spins things in a very approachable way, makes them very relatable. Also, it rained for like four days in a row at least. And when I say it rained, like pouring 80% of the day. Lots of soggy shoes, soggy socks, squishy walking noises. Lots of feeling super connected to many different people and then realizing that I am going to enjoy having some space and quiet time. My room is kind of a mess. I should probably do laundry. Niko was here. I have to go to Kalamazoo and back tomorrow. It's going to be another insanely busy week. I am really excited about RC Review. I want more Miranda and tea and coziness. I have been too scatterbrained with all the shit that I've had to do and I need to focus and get more organized.

   I thought it was going to be awful that I waited until tonight to write my short story for tutorial tomorrow (which, incidentally, I can't go to because of aforementioned scatterbrainedness), but as my thoughts brewed up in my headspace, I knew there was a small scene that I had to at least write out even though I knew it was going to be a bit emotionally difficult, but it was one of those things that I have to realize I would regret not getting out at least as artistically as I heard it in my head. So I sat down and started writing it and got to two paragraphs which told all I needed and then I was like, "Oh, there's an idea of how to make this into a story." And bam. Story. Story that made me feel on the verge of tears at some points writing it, but that's good, right? I feel like, especially after what I overheard at the previous appointment last week, tutorials are really like therapy. Yes, we learn how to improve our writing (therapy in itself) one-on-one with a really great professor, but doing such an intimate thing helps. It just helps.

   And I want to be like Pam Houston and write really great poetic short stories about these crazy adventures and how great it can be to be single but not too much because sometimes she gets a bit whiny or carries on like, "Why am I still single? Why do men suck?" cus they all bust out on her but not that stuff, more like the rapids stories and the travelling the world stories are amazing. I always come back to her and just marvel.